Once upon a time, a Canadian lad with stars in his eyes, whose name was Rob Ford, went to Hollywood. He wanted to see the movie people up close — the ones who walked the red carpets, the ones who went on talk shows. He wanted to be, as the Little Mermaid sang in his daughter’s favourite movie, “part of that world.”
And, O, it was dazzling. For a time. But then he found out what many another innocent lad and lass has before him — that Hollywood has a way of spitting people like him out. After all, they don’t call it the Boulevard of Broken Dreams for nothing. He walked a red carpet. The stars made fun of him behind his back. He went on a talk show. The stars made fun of him to his face. It wasn’t glamorous at all. It was awful, and humiliating, and made a lad want to take to drink.
But he was trying not to do that anymore. So he came home — which was as dismal as ever. People made fun of him there, too. Eventually, he lost his job. The world moved on. Hollywood forgot all about him. He was forced to face the truth: He was just an overweight millionaire with oversized problems.
And that’s when the magic began. Oh, wait, no, that was fantasy too. He reached for a beer.
– Frank Moher